Masturbation

I hit her, hit her really hard against
everything I found impossible to break
and I begged her of silence
not to utter pain or pleasure
I showed my bruises and scars
let her drink the guilt up on my sex
But she refuses with some joy
I smell something mingling with fragrance and sweat
She looks quite fat and dumb in her usual dress
And my heart beats so fast
I chased her down the alley
And raped her hard till she became lifeless
I rubbed my body with the obliviousness
Tied to the pleasure
And I would kill all the instincts of
somebody’s mother on that utopia
I was terminated entirely to eternity by my very self
I hit her again today
Since she wouldn’t let go of her pity breathing in me
I showed no mercy
Wringing her, with shimmering mirage of something
Something that would keep me off animalism
Yet, we failed, miserably she is still in life
Couldn’t leave me out on my own
Tried to get me ingrained with
She and that emptiness
Taking revenge on all the little girls
I had to be there
Watching her
Getting pleasure on her own …